Post by belmoon on Aug 28, 2007 18:23:34 GMT -5
Just Say Probably Not
Written by Ricard Buonacer
Published: 997 AS
Written by Ricard Buonacer
Published: 997 AS
You may have heard about them from friends or ads or any number of sources. You may find them intriguing, tempting, glamorous. Well, let me tell you: they’re not.
Power-altering drugs are bad for you. All respected medical scientists confirm this. At the minimum, they can have long-term effects on your mental and physical health.
Let us take an example: you may have heard about fluoritritikalamide, or FTK. Your friends probably call it something like “Shellshock”, “Black Bomb”, or “Black Devil”. You probably know that it temporarily enhances your powers far beyond what you can normally achieve, tripling or more your innate ability. But did you know that such power comes at a very high price? Side effects include depression, uncontrollable rage, and in some cases, the complete loss of control over your power. Just think if you were no longer able to control the massive fireballs emanating from your nostrils! Think of the chaos you would create!
Or take anthelamocelanine, or ALC, also known as “Twister”, “Screwballs”, “Corkscrew”, or “Deathdice”. As everyone knows, ALC inverts your power – if you were able to wield fire, you may be able to wield ice or water for a brief time. However, the effects are unpredictable, and the results may make no sense, particularly where a complementary power is not obvious. There have been recorded instances of people who originally had woodworking powers being able to fire lethal jets of superheated kitchen grease over distances of two hundred yards after taking ALC, but more often than not, rather than giving you a relatively unpredictable power, ALC is fatal. People with more elemental powers are at lower risk of death, but not safe.
You may have heard of metalanthascopoline, or MLS. You’ve probably heard of it as “Metaphor”. Well, let me tell you, MLS is a crime against the very structure of the universe and all that is right and holy. Not only does it carry a 100% fatality rate, but it is also the most strictly controlled substance in all Genoa, possession punishable by twelve hundred years of unimaginable torture. So don’t use it, and certainly don’t go looking for it, because it doesn’t exist anyway. It’s an urban legend. And it gives you terrible halitosis.
So, um, yes. Don’t use drugs.